The Holy Conspiracy .. !

So guys here I am back with my new post .. Its been quite a long time I wrote some thing here .. !

Have you ever looked at ur watch and observed the motion of its dial? .. Well I did … and as it had always been time amuses me a lot. It unfolds its new facet every now and then. This time I am a witness to its sheer nonchalance. Sometimes I wonder, if time had ever been a human, It would have been a man for sure, not a woman coz they are by default soft and friendly. But,I am sure he would have been a one tough guy made of stone, who is preoccupied even with his boring work of just ticking ahead.

Rather, for me it could only qualify as a mere machine programmed to make an unsighted journey in to the future with no strings of feelings attached. I call it a machine becoz it contradicts with the most innate human quality of making mistakes. It never skips ticking through our hard times, nor does it freezes through our good times. The fact that it is so blatantly perfect irks me the most.

Anyways .. this cold treatment of mine towards time is the result of my long waiting for something to happen. I was looking for a good job offer in Hyderabad coz I wanted to be with my family when they needed me the most. I had other job offers ready in hand but all of them would post me in some random city other than Hyderabad and I didn't want to count on them as there was a huge risk factor of Luck involved . I don’t, believe in "random" luck. It is always associated with the hard work one puts in and I believe that it favors only to them who put their best efforts and who do not give up.

When you wait for something to happen and if it doesn’t seem to happen then you are bound to feel the indifference of time towards you. The slow, deadening and stoical movement of the dial in your watch mocks at you and reminds you of your impuissance and its ultimate power over you.

Added to it my other companies have started giving away their dates of joining and this added to the fuel. When I was in that dire phase something luring came my way. It was the referral walk-in’s of Broadridge on the coming Sunday. It was the ONLY last opportunity for me to stay back in Hyderabad. But somehow luck was not in my favor. That weekend I planned to visit my dad in tirupathi along with family. So, my plan was to take the exam somehow, come back and attend any further interviews. Since it was a walk-in I thought many people would turn up and screening them would take its own sweet time, so by then I could be back. So ,I straight away went ahead and took the written test.

As the train was scheduled to start in the evening, I slept for a while after coming back to home. Later, I woke up when my phone started ringing right into my ear and to my shock it was the HR guy with a spine-chilling news. No, I did not fail, I cleared but the next round of interview was scheduled on the immediate next day, the same day on which I would be landing in tirupathi.

Then comes the asli mazaa. I tried my best to defer the appointment to a later date but all I could hear was a vague “will call u back” statement. It sounded worse than that of a guy using the same line to break up with his girl friend. My mom and sis got really upset when I asked them to cancel the trip and stayed back, so that I could attend the interview. So was I, but this interview was very important and I was desperate, helpless and lost.

Also, from the beginning mom didn’t wanted me to put so much of effort and hunt for other jobs, all over again. She and vani tried to convince me that they would be able to manage home even when dad and I were away from home. But that helped neither them nor me :D. Interestingly, some of my friends were also not that supportive of my job hunt, but, for different reasons, which had no influence on me because according to me, neither I was snatching anybody’s job nor I was hurting anybody. And, I am not the kind of those selfless poeple who sacrifice things to find solace in it. I am an Ayn Rand product and yes I am a selfish man when it comes to my dreams and desires and I am proud to be one.

Hmm ... anyway that was a little deviation, So nothing worked and It was high time for me to take a call. And this is where Chepuri Srinivas is very bad at. That too under stress, he just cannot make up his mind and always turns out to his friends and family whenever things gets difficult for him to handle. But this situation was kinda tricky as it dealt with my personal choices and only I could have taken the appropriate decision. Then after a lot of mental trauma, I decided to go with my family, believing in my destiny that if not BR some other Hyderabad company would come my way if I were really destined to stay back here. I never lost the hope.

It was a pretty difficult thing for me to do. I lost the only chance I had. But nonetheless, leaving everything else aside, I was looking forward to this trip which I chose to make. I have had many trips to tirupathi, but this one was special. This time it was a new me, a new individual, a new soul, who is now more mature enough to deal with the things. I don’t know why, but, there was this sense of achievement as I sat with my family and travelled with them, which made me completely forget about BR. May be it was because of the regret-less choice I made prior to the trip. That's quite an achievement for me becoz I always think in both the ways and regret later for not taking the other way after sticking to a particular one. yeah thats me :D .. ! So which is why I am gonna cherish this trip all my life.. :) .. !

Well after coming back to Hyderabad and when I almost got prepared to relocate to a new place; my phone vibrates in my pocket amidst heavy traffic. As I was driving, I couldn’t attend it for the first time and, when I took the call later, I heard a familiar voice; unlike the guy who cheated on his girl friend, my HR stood by his word and called me back :), with yet another spine chilling news. This time it was a gud one, my next round of interview was rescheduled after 2 days from then. My hope brought me back my lost opportunity, now holding up that opportunity tight with me was in my hands and the rest is all history now.

" It's been 2 months I joined BROADRIDGE FINANCIAL SOLUTIONS and, I STILL STAY WITH MY FAMILY ... :) .. !! "

When you finally get what you wanted, and then look at the same watch, you will find the same stoical movement of the dial to be a calm and composed one. The silence it bore then, reminds you of the sincere and earnest efforts it has been putting to make your desires come true. If things do not turn up as you have expected, never lose the hope, just give your best, the rest is bound to come your way.

In Paulo Coelho words,

"And, when you want something, the entire universe conspires in helping you to achieve it."

--- The Alchemist

P.S:

It’s a holy conspiracy not because It had something to do with the holy place of tirupathi .. it could have been (after all, I am a god fearing person) but, for me, "holiness" here lies in the earnest efforts one puts into fulfilling his dreams and it is more like the hope I was referring to.

"Engineering -- Smile because it happened.”

With the last working day of our final year nearing us, facebook is cluttered with full of emotional quotes on leaving college and friends. These observations gave me the fuel to write about my engineering life and how it changed me into a better person.

Engineering is all about treasuring fond memories ... making friends n fighting with them; flirting with crush’s n falling in love; bunking classes, hanging out in the canteen, watching lame movies together, week end get-togethers, birthday parties, playing volley ball; Messaging, chit-chatting, catcalling, making fun of lecturers, sleeping, drawing, reading novels n what not except listening to the lecture during a class; copying assignments n last minute submissions; combined mugging up, cursing the paper setter for screwing up the exam, waiting for the results and finally applying for revaluation.

These memories made us forget 7 semesters of 36 subjects, 17 labs and uncounted lectures and assignments.

But on personal terms,

Engineering for me has been a journey of self discovery. I made great friends and had great fun with them. I made people laugh and laughed with them. I made people cry and cried even more for making them cry. I made goals and worked towards them. I made mistakes and learnt from them. I made compromises and lived contently. I made great impressions with the faculty and got great grades ( :D ). But, I made one thing of which I am very proud -
“I lived this journey with a perpetual smile no matter what came to me".

I call engineering a journey because; every journey has a purpose and brings certain impactful changes. Every journey surprises with its gifts and grieves. My journey of engineering has been no exception - it taught me lessons like a mother, protected me like a father, encouraged me like a sister, helped me like a friend. It made me the complete man I am today.

Engineering taught me to make FRIENDS. My first year had been a joyful ride. I made great friends in a very short span of time. My second year tested my ability to stand by my friendships. I tumbled down for a while, but resurrected only to win my friends back. My third year also tested, but this time it was my ability to balance my new friendships with the old ones. I wanted both of them and hence, didn’t give up; I then learnt to master the art of balancing my life for my dearest ones. Today , my final year gave me all I could ask for in this front. On looking back, I am glad that I made this journey.

"A journey is best measured in friends rather than miles .. :-)"

Engineering taught me to WIN. In my schooling and intermediate days, I never won any major competitions, I was always lost in a contention.Speaking in front of a group of people was a nightmare to me. I was a very under confident person; I used to shy away from meeting new people.But engineering changed it all for me; it gave me the courage and opportunity to face these challenges. I won over stage fear and can speak with confidence; I can now stand up to any problem and face it on my own. I won many International and national competitions during my engineering. On looking back, these winning moments make me feel proud.

"Winning moments .. :-)"

Engineering taught me PASSION. During my third year I realized computer science is where I should be in. I think it was my destiny which chose this field for me when I was completely in-cognizant of its potential and I really thank my destiny for this. When I look back at my 17 years of education, it is, at my engineering I actually read with passion. I enjoyed working in some of my labs and loved reading some of my academic text books. Academically, my first two years have been regretful but fortunately, last two years have covered up for this remorse. On looking back, I may not be a class topper but I am a very content person in this regard.

"Product of passion -- a winning website :-) "

Also, Last but definitely not the least, engineering taught me to LOVE. Life is a journey too, and love is what makes that journey worthwhile.

Speaking of my engineering friends,

We might not be the best of best friends, but we all lived our joyful and sorrowful days together. We stood for each other when needed. We all found solace from our problems in each other’s presence under the roof of engineering. On looking back through my last four years, we have shared every emotion possible among ourselves. We loved, laughed, pulled each other’s leg, gossiped, got possessive, fought, cried, hated, repented, repaid and rejoined.

I wanted to write this blog because, we all traveled through the same journey but we forgot that we are destined to different destinations. With the journey of engineering coming to its end, everyone is so preoccupied with the destination that they are forgetting the course of journey. We are at the destination, and its appropriate only at the destination to appreciate the journey we had.

Time is a companion that goes with us on our journey. It reminds us to cherish each moment, because it will never come again. " What we leave behind is not as important as how we have lived ". Our lessons come from the journey not the destination.

Dedicated to,
CSE - 1,
Silver Jubilee Batch,
MVSR Engineering College.

Finally,

“Don’t cry because it’s getting over. Smile because it happened.”

I wanna grow up once again ..

My student days are about to end .. :-(
Life has become so boring and monotonous. Everything around me bores me now. My last semester cursed me with heaps of time. We know that time doesn't move back for us but it is seldom told that doesn't move forward either. It’s unfortunate that one cannot escape from living every moment of time. According to me time is the most mysterious element of the nature. In our happy days, time seems to be running hastily ahead of its schedule while it reluctantly slows down in our sorrowful days.
At one level, things are so uncertain for me, there is this job offer of which I am skeptical of joining and there is this offer that fulfills my dream of doing my masters. My life is now behaving like a pendulum where-in my thoughts are oscillating between these two extremes. I am tired with this meaningless journey of my thoughts.I want this stupid pendulum to come to a halt.
At another level, I am going through the roller coaster ride of my relationships. The real roller coaster ride at-least has the rail road to keep things in control, but there are no such courtesies in the nature’s amusement park, it’s theme is way ahead deadlier. I have been on this ride for quite a long, and it became boring too. But thankfully, the ride is closing in slowly.

I never knew growing up would be such a pain. I heard my friends talking about the cruelty of this reality but never experienced it as i am now. Recently I had to do this job which was kind of tough for me to do it alone. Unfortunately none of my friends were available to accompany me. That day, I missed my daddy the most, coz I realized then that he is the only person in the world who can come for me at any time keeping his work aside no matter how important it is. Even he was not available that day as hez living in tirupati now.

However, I called up my dad and told him that I had to do this job alone. That day on phone, keeping all his important work aside my dad explained me each and every minutest detail that would help me in performing the job comfortably. As my dad was doing so I realized how much I still wanna be a kid .. how much I still wanna grow under his shade .. how much I don't wanna become independent ...
As a kid everyone dreams to become independent, at-least I dreamt. But today, I am afraid I don’t wanna become one. I now know that this incident is just a trailer of my coming future. That’s scaring me. At this point of time the only thing that comes to my mind is this song …

Bachpan to gaya
Jawani bhi gayi
Ek pal to ab humein
Jeene do jeene do
Give me some sunshine
Give me some rainGive me another chanceI wanna grow up once again
Na na nana .. na na nana .. na na nana ..
YES, I wanna go back to those days ..

When my mother used to wake me up for the school and i would never wake up making the same well-worn reason of "stomach ache" to skip my school and play "teacher-teacher" with other kids of my street.

When my father used to forcefully drop me into the skool becoz of the repeated complaints made by my teachers.

When neethakka used to do all my biology diagrams and homework.
When my favorite pastime used to be fighting with vani .. I remember once pushing her through the heights of the staircase and how it left a permanent scar on her face :D.

When I used to wear the night dress stitched by my mom from her torn saree, sleep beside my dad and feel protected.

"I wanna go back to those days and live every moment of joy and sorrow all over again. I don't wanna become an independent person. I wanna live under these wonderful ppl's shadow always".

Dedicated to my family .. :)
Also .. Happy Birthday Neethakka .. :)No matter how many great friends we make in our lives, It is our family which gives us unselfish love and concern even without asking for it. Love my family .. !!

Democracy or Hypocrisy ???

I remember the days when my school principal used to take lectures on Indian history and Politics – how we fought for the freedom, how we established a democratic form of government and how our constitution declares India to be a sovereign, socialist, secular and democratic republic. To be frank, i never understood what these technical terms used to mean. I remember by-hearting the seven fundamental rights without having understood their significance. Like any other child , I was more bothered about my grades and those “very goods” and “stars” on my mark sheets.

Let me remind u people of the popular 2 marks questions often asked in our Unit Tests .. which are now going to serve as guidelines in understanding this post ..

Q) What is Democracy ?

Ans) Democracy is a government “of the people, by the people and for the people”.

Q) State our Fundamental rights ?

Ans) There are seven Fundamental Rights and they are as follows ..

1. The right to equality
2. The right to freedom of speech and expression
3. The right to freedom from exploitation
4. The right to freedom of religion
5. Cultural and educational rights
6. The right to constitutional remedies
7. The right to education

In those innocent and naive days of my life everything about India seemed very beautiful and perfect. Whenever i used to recite those seven fundamental rights .. I used to feel very secure as a citizen of India since our constitution ensures us justice in all ways.

But today as i grew into an individual of rational ideas and with the increasing exposure to the reality which contradicts the way i pictured it has made me very critical of certain basics of our government.

We claim ours is the biggest democracy in the world. I seriously question the authenticity of this statement. I have very high regards for the system of democracy as it is the best possible form of government ever conceived by human beings. But, unfortunately i feel our government is anything but democracy, in a true sense.

I have been going through this book called “Discovery of India” written by Jawaharlal Nehru, to understand the purpose of our leaders in choosing democracy over other forms of government. I found the sole purpose was to ensure “FREEDOM” to every citizen of India. The result of the pursuit of this freedom was our constitution. This is clearly evident in our Fundamental rights.

But lets talk of reality now .. the political gamble begins like this …

Elections are announced. All the wealthy, powerful and higher caste candidates bid their amount in order to get a ticket. The highest bidder is given the ticket. The next highest bidder leaves the party, joins another party and if everything turns out well, he gets a ticket there , else he would start denouncing the party in the media as a part of fame game. As the remaining bidders having nothing much to do, sulk sitting at a corner.

Political parties release the list of candidates participating in the elections claiming every sect of people is given equal opportunity ( this is a clear breach of first fundamental right of equality ). Also, ” Wealthy, powerful and higher caste” .. are clearly “Plutocracy, autocracy and oligarchy” forms of government respectively but definitely NOT democracy.

Then, each candidate starts campaigning for the election. He completely exploits the “The Right to Freedom of speech and expression” by throwing long and resentful tirades at the opposition party. He may also exploit the religious and regional differences among the people and convert them into his vote banks. That’s a clear violation of “The Right to freedom from exploitation”. Then all the parties are accused of corruption which is today a kind of norm practiced in every field in our country, so decided not talk of it here.

Biggest flaw in this system is .. people are forced to elect one among the given list of candidates. If democracy claims that its a government of the people and by the people .. then i demand people’s participation in zeroing in the candidates itself. This can be done by conducting public discussions and pre-election polls through the media.

Anyways, in the end, a single party or 2-3 parties pair up to gain the majority, win the elections and the government is set up. Then the ministries are given to the favorites of the head of the party. That’s nepotism not democracy again. Then the government strategically forgets all the promises it made “for the people” and the so called leaders start fleecing the public money for the next five years to recuperate their losses occurred in the elections.

The bottom line is .. the present system cannot be called democracy, It is a shameful hybrid of plutocracy, autocracy, oligarchy, nepotism, kleptocracy and blah blah blah. Then why do we claim that ours is a biggest democracy .. isn’t it hypocrisy ???

The present system might have served its purpose 2-3 decades ago but the times have changed from then – levels of corruption have increased enormously. Since change is inevitable, i believe its high time some stringent changes have to be made to the current system in order to substantiate the integrity of our constitution which was put forth by the motivation of true democracy and the freedom it ensures.

Only suggestion i would like to make is .. Be honest and stick to the definition of democracy .. Increase people's participation in the elections and in forming the government. Lets buck up and help India in becoming the worlds best democracy.

P. S :

I might have hurt few ppl’s emotions by calling our good old democracy a hypocrisy, also i have been very critical .. but i didn’t intend to insult the system of democracy .. i am just hurt with the present system.